I am a part of the UK Women Speakers Collective, a group of female leaders led by Danielle Stickland. We had two days of intensive and incredible training in November 2019. Yesterday was the third Zoom Call with all the women leaders in the group & Danielle shared with us.
I posted about this on Facebook and Instagram and a few people said they’d love to know more of what was shared so here it is!
We had an email sent to us beforehand reminding us of the call and asking us to send in questions for Danielle. I’ll be honest- I love Danielle Strickland. I hope she doesn’t ever read this because it’s actually quite ‘cringe’ how much I just think she’s awesome. She is real and doesn’t fit the ‘female speaker’ look that we often see- plus she’s really ‘done stuff’, lived life how Jesus calls us to live. It is her passion and love for God as well as her questions, curiosity and honesty that inspire and challenge me. So yeah- total fan girl over here!
When I read the email I totally skimmed over the ‘Who wants to ask Danielle a question’ part! In many group settings, I am not the person to stick up a hand because I fear looking silly. Yet then a voice, that I believe was God, pushed me. ‘This may be my last opportunity to ever ask DS a question.’
So I asked, why not me!? Why not ask, I have things I want to know – I actually asked four questions and clicked send. Then I panicked when it was time for the call!
Danielle came on the call and thanked the person who sent the Qs because it was the most polite ‘English’ way of asking a question she’d ever seen. So I was then pretty sure I was the only person who had asked questions, and then was worried- especially about my second question!
The whole teaching was then on four life tips – based on my questions because she liked them! Awesome. So don’t disqualify yourself or think you can’t ask or not you- do it!
1. Leading/Opportunities/Life/Ministry balanced with Family – when you say yes/no!
Danielle’s answer in bullet points:
Imbalance is my friend!
-Stop aiming for unattainable balance
– We can’t get an A* in everything! (For example, not being great at kids school lunches or not having the neatest home- I can live with that)
– Yet if the most essential things in life aren’t working, you need to bring them back to top of the list, you need space for them (eg marriage)
2. Do you ever feel like quitting and just not changing the world? (Am I even allowed to ask that!?)
Danielle shared thoughts from conversations she had with an incredible woman, founder of Thistle Farms, Becca Stevens.
– We think we have to be *inspired* to change the world
– That we have to wake up and feel *inspired*
– Yet if we think about being a parent: I am not a morning person but my kid gets me up. I am not inspired to get him breakfast but he needs it so I get it done!
– Every day I don’t wake up wanting to change world – I put breakfast on table- I get it done! I do the meeting, I finish the project – I do what’s in front of me.
– There are of course moments of inspiration. For example again with parenting where we think ‘wow I so love I get to do this’ where we the see bigger picture. There’s moments in ministry too where we think ‘yeh this is what I’m made for, this is the bigger picture of how God is issuing me’
– Yet are there days I wake up and don’t wanna change the world- absolutely!
– Danielle has been challenged by Becca around her language. As ‘No one is called to change the world- we are called to LOVE the world, usually we have to change ourselves so we can love it better’
3/4 Rest/Mentors/Rhythms of life
Danielle took my last questions and broke it down into four areas of absolute gold..
B E L O V E D
– God said to Danielle ‘The Church think they need too much (structure/money/ buildings/ skills) – you need Love’
Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.
1 John 4.7-8
-Need to learn to love yourself, most of us have not been taught. We’ve learned how to shame/criticise/punish/hide ourselves but not how to love ourselves.
-For anyone but especially those speaking/platform/ministry- you need love. Firstly – for you!
– If she could say one essential thing to work on (and wished she had for herself earlier) it is to love yourself as Jesus does.
– Try to love my body, do healthy things BECAUSE I LOVE my body not from being ashamed of it.
– Try healthy practises BECAUSE I LOVE my body rather than punishing it.
– If feeling at the end of myself- just BE LOVED by God.
P A C E
Danielle shared teaching from a man she’s heard but I didn’t get his name, sorry.
– We see Joshua: For six days, ‘March around Jericho once’. Imagine day one of that with an army ready to go! Yet the leader saying, nope I know you can do more but today just go and do one lap of Jericho (just one)!
The PACE OF GRACE – we think need find a pace & stick to it but no, find pace for now
Then comes the day- to walk around the wall 7 times is today!
We need to know the pace God has for us in His timing. To know if He is saying one lap is all I need from you today and not rush to want to do more, or on days it’s 7 to push on and believe for the wall to come down.
Find out what God has for you & staying in that = discipleship
Allow God the space & time to direct what’s happening rather than us trying to make it happen.
– Take time to listen to Him! Rather than rushing to say ‘Yes’ to things pause and ask ‘I could do that but God should I do that?’
– Make adjustments when it hurts, don’t just keep going. The pace can change!
BRING YOUR WHOLE SELF
-You are a whole person. Yet we act like fragments. Mind/body/family/soul/spirit/emotions/ are not separate.
– Danielle says she’s not taking her preaching self to an event, she is bringing her whole self to the platform/green room/family/ this town.
– We are IN CHRIST and that’s why we are whole! We are all broken,our body/mind/emotions are not perfect. Yet we find our wholeness in Christ!
This helps us to be more authentic & way less afraid!
To be able to have people see we a real person, not feel ‘oh no you found out I’m human’ !
Nobody does this alone! Ask for help, share the load, do it in community!
I found so much of what was shared so useful. Personally it felt like she’d seen beyond my questions and to the heart of what we need to be able to lead and live in a healthy way. I hope this has encouraged you & maybe start by loving yourself a little more today 🤍